Having this week off for Thanksgiving Break, I’ve been
ruminating over the whole idea of gratitude. What am I really grateful for? I
can honestly say that not being able to let go has been a big part of my life for the past
few months, and I’m finally getting to the acceptance part of letting go. I
really am truly grateful for that.
You see, I have a huge problem with being able to let go.
Once an idea gets into my mind, or a person makes their way into my heart, it
is extremely difficult for me to get it out, even when it is obvious that the
ideas or feelings are not going to work out or in my best interest. The worse
part of my not being able to let go is that it blocks me from so much. I can’t
focus on what needs to be done because my mind is fixated so much on what I
want to happen. I can’t get things done around my house because my mind is
passing time thinking about what I don’t have in my life. Even more destructive
for me, I can’t concentrate enough to even write, or, when I do finally sit
down to write, it’s all about those things I can’t let go of.
So, my mantra this week has been “Let Go.” It’s painful
sometimes to chant it. It makes me cry. It makes me long for what I need to
release. It also reminds me that there is more to life than those things my
mind can’t seem to get away from. When I feel my mind wandering to those ideas,
I say out loud, “Let Go.” I said it in the middle of the grocery store, during
Thanksgiving dinner, while getting a pedicure, and always just before I slip
into sleep. It helps. Really, it does. Just say it until you believe it. I was
able to write this very post because I kept telling myself, “Let Go.”
I’m setting myself free from my thoughts. I am unblocked. I’ve
Let Go.